Actual Freedom – Mailing List ‘D’ Correspondence

January 7 2013

Re: it is impossible to marry Actualism and Buddhism

RESPONDENT No. 6 (Sock Puppet ‘AA’): [...] a range of material was found in a memory stick that Richard had accidentally left behind in a place he stayed in India in 2010. The owner of the guest house handed it over to investigators and some other people whom Richard met during his visit examined the contents of the memory stick. [...].

RICHARD: I have no hesitation whatsoever in stating, for a fact, that no such memory stick was [quote] ‘accidentally left behind’ [endquote] by me, either in the guest house specifically referred to – the hotel Shivalay cottages at Heini, Upper Dharamkot, Himachal Pradesh – or in any other residence, place or location anywhere at all in India, during my March 26th to September 2nd visit, on a regular tourist visa, in 2010. (Richard, List D, No. 37a, 6 January 2013).

RESPONDENT: So, would you also state that ‘[No. 6 (Sock Puppet ‘AA’)]’, or ‘[No. 6 (Sock Puppet ‘A’)]’ or anyone else that she alludes to in the quote above... did not have access to any such memory stick? Or simply that you did not ‘accidentally leave it behind?’

RICHARD: G’day No. 25, Good questions ... I am glad you asked.

First and foremost, do I strike you as being the type of person to be so casual and/or clueless and/or careless as to have [quote] ‘accidentally left behind’ [endquote] such a memory stick which contains, purportedly, ‘a range of material’ of such a devastating nature as those ill-meaning cowards are making it out to be?

(This entire charade has the hallmarks of some 3rd-rate television soap-opera; as such it is quite entertaining, in and of itself, and so I will couch my response accordingly).

The ‘owner of the guest house’ (i.e. the hotel Shivalay cottages) is a retired Indian Army Officer, of the old-school variety and, thus, a right and proper gentleman, whom I will choose to call Colonel Singh.

I stayed in a cottage of his for somewhat less than four weeks and departed on the 23/06/2010; as the booking for my sojourn there had been pre-arranged via the very welcome services of two up-standing residents of Dharamsala, a well-respected couple whom Colonel Singh personally knew very well, by ... um ... by Someone Urgently Rewriting Both Her Ideas, then it is more than passing strange that any-such memory stick [quote] ‘accidentally left behind’ [endquote] did not get passed right on back to me, personally, well before I flew out of India more than two months later, on 02/09/2010, as at no stage was my forwarding address unknown/ unknowable.

Indeed, one would have expected, at the very least, a courteous telephone call advising me that some-such memory stick [quote] ‘accidentally left behind’ [endquote] had been located and was being held secure in the hotel safe, pending further advice for its safe and prompt dispatch back to me, because Colonel Singh is that kind of man ... a right and proper gentleman, of the ‘Pukka Sahib’ variety, as already mentioned.

As for the good Colonel Singh having duly ‘handed it over to investigators’ ... well, now, it all depends upon just who those ‘investigators’ might be as it is a somewhat vague term; here in Australia a term like that would make one automatically think of the Police Force but, then again, just what is the relationship like betwixt the Indian Army and the Indian Police, eh?

Now, without in any way impugning the Indian Police – no doubt held with all due respect by ordinary standards – it must be said that the Indian Army does not operate by ordinary standards as the Indian Army has a higher calling, than mere police, and thus answers to a Higher Standard ... the Highest Standard in the land, in fact, as there is nothing higher than the Indian Army.

(I am just trying to get into Colonel Singh’s mind, you see, so as to ascertain just what ‘investigators’ he would deem worthy to have ‘handed it over to’ and all indications are of it not being a course of action he would be undertaking, anyway, whatever the provenance might be of any memory stick which may ever come to be in his temporary possession).

So, in regards to ‘some other people’, whom I had met during my visit, having ‘examined the contents’ of any-such memory stick [quote] ‘accidentally left behind’ [endquote], presumably by now, in some other residence, my mind invariably returns, again and again, to a certain gentleman of the Indian Civil Service – who holds a position somewhat analogous to Sir Humphrey Appleby of the ‘Yes Minister’ television legend – as being the most likely contender as he was quite intrigued, vis-a-vis actualism/ actual freedom and yours truly, by virtue of having being introduced to both by a mutual acquaintance.

Yes, indeed, Sir Humphrey would be interested in examining the contents of some-such memory stick – be it accidentally left behind or, even, be it of a purloined nature – as he was prone to the issuing forth of avuncular advice, of the rational kind, to a trusting thirty-something year-old woman.

As I said earlier, they are good questions, No. 25, and I am glad you asked them.

Regards, Richard.

P.S.: Speaking of giving ‘rational advice’, the text towards the end of Message No. 10780 – starting at the words ‘What concerns me is’ – expresses some puzzlement as to what might have possessed a person, such as what Sir Humphrey is, to have impressed such irrational advice, as is reported there, upon an obviously very frightened woman. Viz.: (Richard, List D, No. 24, 26 January 2012).

January 7 2013

Re: it is impossible to marry Actualism and Buddhism Posted

RICHARD: [...]. Again, I would suggest accessing that URL as there is both a demonstration and further explanation regarding the entire matter.

RESPONDENT: Ok, so based upon what you’ve written and the link you provided, I suppose that I can infer that you are stating (although indirectly) that...

RICHARD: So as to save my fellow human beings from falling into the folly of inferring, or in any other way reading into my words, things that are actually not there, I will re-formulate an earlier response of mine from last year.

RESPONDENT: I cannot agree that inferring is ‘folly...’

RICHARD: As I did not say it is a folly to infer I have no idea who it is you cannot agree with that [quote] ‘inferring is ‘folly...’ [endquote].

RESPONDENT: Hmm. The words ‘the folly of inferring’ are remarkably similar to ‘inferring is folly,’ no?

RICHARD: G’day No. 25, It is only when you lift my ‘folly of inferring’ words out of their obviously essential contextual setting that they are remarkably similar to ‘inferring is folly’.

RESPONDENT: Even so similar that they mean the same thing.

RICHARD: It is only when you lift my ‘folly of inferring’ words out of their obviously essential contextual setting that they are even so similar that they mean the same thing.

RESPONDENT: Since they mean the same thing... you did indeed state the same meaning as ‘inferring is folly’ when you wrote ‘the folly of inferring...’ (followed by the word ‘or’).

RICHARD: Since they only mean the same thing when you lift my ‘folly of inferring’ words out of their obviously essential contextual setting I did not indeed state the same meaning as ‘inferring is folly’ when I wrote ‘the folly of inferring...’ (followed by the word ‘or’ *and* all the rest of the sentence).

RESPONDENT: If you’ll read what you actually wrote, you will see that I was disagreeing with you, since you used a phrase, ‘the folly of inferring...’ – which means the same thing in spite of slightly different wording as ‘inferring is folly.’

RICHARD: If you will read what I actually wrote you will see that you were able to be disagreeing with me only because you lifted my ‘folly of inferring’ words out of their obviously essential contextual setting ... such as to make them mean the same thing, in spite of slightly different wording, as ‘inferring is folly’.

RESPONDENT: To use your turn of phrase... ‘Since I am not a mind reader...’ how am I supposed to to know that you mean something different than what you actually wrote?

RICHARD: As I did not mean something different than what I actually wrote your usage of my turn of phrase ‘Since I am not a mind reader...’ is a non sequitur.

*

RICHARD: Perhaps if I were to re-formulate my above words to be more in accord with what you wrote ... to wit:

• [Rephrasal]: So as to save my fellow human beings from falling into the folly of supposing they can infer that I am stating (although indirectly), via my words, things that are actually not there, I will re-formulate an earlier response of mine from last year. [end rephrasal] (Richard, List D, No. 25a, 6 January 2013).

RESPONDENT: Now this I do understand as different the ‘the folly of inferring...’

RICHARD: Yet if you had not lifted my ‘folly of inferring’ words out of their obviously essential contextual setting you would have understood the difference the first time around.

Do you realise that the only reason I simply re-formulated those (now much further above) words was to obviate having a syntactic lesson, such as this, and thus get a move on with that one-off exception/ one-off opportunity diversion – a diversion away from the topic to hand (‘It Is Impossible To Marry Actualism And Buddhism’) which began this thread – so as to all the more sooner get back to attending to my half-finished email to Claudiu (in response to his very timely buddhistic practice vis-a-vis the actualism method post in Message No. 12xxx) which is currently just short of totalling 500 posts ago?

And I say ‘very timely’ because of my clearly-stated reason, on the 26th of December, for having temporarily come out of my retirement from writing. Viz.:

• [Richard]: ‘My current return to writing was prompted solely by the evidential necessity of warning my fellow human beings not to follow in the footsteps of the affers’. (Message No. 12108, Richard, List D, No 37a, 26 December 2012).

Can you not see why I am so obdurate in regards to not acceding to the clamorous demands that I expand that (already diversionary) one-off exception/ opportunity into a ‘two-off’, so to speak, and a ‘three-off’, a ‘four-off’, a ‘five-off’ a ‘six-off’, and so on, and so forth, ad infinitum/ad nauseam?

RESPONDENT: ... and I appreciate your point as it is indeed folly to infer (and believe) something in your words that is not there.

RICHARD: I am pleased that you can now appreciate what I said the first time around for it is indeed folly to infer, or in any other way read into my words, things that are actually not there.

Here it is again (copy-pasted from the top of this email). Viz.:

• [Richard]: So as to save my fellow human beings from falling into the folly of inferring, or in any other way reading into my words, things that are actually not there, I will re-formulate an earlier response of mine from last year.

Perhaps it was the comma before my ‘or in any other way reading into’ qualifier which made your eyes stop there and thus take it as saying that inferring per se is folly (that ‘to infer, period, is folly’)? For example:

• [example only]: ‘So as to save my fellow human beings from falling into the folly of inferring’. [end example].

Here it is sans that ‘or in any other way reading into’ qualifier:

• [Richard]: So as to save my fellow human beings from falling into the folly of inferring from my words things that are actually not there I will reformulate an earlier response of mine from last year.

Given it was in an over-all context as well, of me tightening-up my wording even further so as to not have the words imply (a speaker or writer implies; a hearer or reader infers) something less than my intention, it was apposite to include that ‘or in any other way reading into’ qualifier.

Regards, Richard.

January 12 2013

Re: it is impossible to marry Actualism and Buddhism

RESPONDENT No. 6 (Sock Puppet ‘AA’): [...] a range of material was found in a memory stick that Richard had accidentally left behind in a place he stayed in India in 2010. The owner of the guest house handed it over to investigators and some other people whom Richard met during his visit examined the contents of the memory stick. [...].

RICHARD: I have no hesitation whatsoever in stating, for a fact, that no such memory stick was [quote] ‘accidentally left behind’ [endquote] by me, either in the guest house specifically referred to – the hotel Shivalay cottages at Heini, Upper Dharamkot, Himachal Pradesh – or in any other residence, place or location anywhere at all in India, during my March 26th to September 2nd visit, on a regular tourist visa, in 2010. (Richard, List D, No. 37a, 6 January 2013).

RESPONDENT: So, would you also state that ‘[No. 6 (Sock Puppet ‘AA’)]’, or ‘[No. 6 (Sock Puppet ‘A’)]’ or anyone else that she alludes to in the quote above... did not have access to any such memory stick? Or simply that you did not ‘accidentally leave it behind?’

RICHARD: Good questions ... I am glad you asked.

First and foremost, do I strike you as being the type of person to be so casual and/or clueless and/or careless as to have [quote] ‘accidentally left behind’ [endquote] such a memory stick which contains, purportedly, ‘a range of material’ of such a devastating nature as those ill-meaning cowards are making it out to be? (Richard, List D, No 25a, 7 January 2013).

RESPONDENT: Personally, I don’t consider it necessary to be a particular ‘type’ of person who would be ‘so casual and/ or clueless and/or careless’ as to have accidentally left a memory stick with sensitive information behind. Every one errs from time to time whether or not they consider themselves perfect or fallible, so I don’t see how you strike someone as being relevant. When I troubleshoot a networking or computer problem, for example, I can take nothing for granted... and you are asking me to take your ‘personality type’ as unable to make such a mistake, which I find an untenable assumption. [...].

*

RESPONDENT: As a followup question... was there any USB drive/ memory stick that you either a) ‘accidentally lost’ or ‘left behind’ or b) were ‘careless’ with... such that the contents could have been copied, stolen, or otherwised compromised during or after your visit to India in 2010?

RICHARD: G’day No. 25, You do seem to have misunderstood the general thrust of my further above response – both my ‘first and foremost’ paragraph and my detailed account of the good Colonel Singh’s character – inasmuch my intent was to demonstrate just how implausible that entire [quote] ‘accidentally left behind’ [end quote] b-grade movie-script style story-line really is.

Maybe it comes from having watched too many ‘Bollywood’ flics but, really now, could she not have come up with a scene which not only zings but moves the plot forward seamlessly, at the same time as maintaining character credibility, into the next on-the-edge-of-seat episode than that.

I mean, c’mon, even ‘[No. 4 (Sock Puppet ‘JS’)]’ spun a much better yarn – before stalking off to forge his destiny and leaving [No. 4 (real name)] to face the music on his own – and he was no Assoc. Prof. of Eng. Lit. steering bright-eyed students to their PhD’s.

Golly, I have seen more tenable plot-lines in the few Mills & Boon I have perused – the total number of which I need only the digits of both hands to count – and I am more than a little surprised it need be brought to your attention. (Ha ... were I to ever resurrect my novel-writing notion it would seem, at this stage at least, that some other person volunteering to be co-author – so as to realistically write about any and all feelings engendered therein – might be what is called-for).

Oh, and just in case you might think I was being frivolous, rather than a touch facetious, in my response then, please, rest assured I am entirely sincere in my considered estimation of both that retired Indian Army officer and the Indian Army itself. Maybe it is because of being ex-military myself – even though but a lowly Non-Commissioned Officer compared to his lofty Commissioned Officer status – that there be an immediate grasp of the situation insofar it was not at all credible he would carelessly park such explosive evidence in the hotel safe for a couple of months before casually handing over to, err, ‘investigators’.

All of which brings me to your brief commentary on ‘sensitive information’ (in response to my ‘of such a devastating nature’ observation) and it must be said that sensitive information – as in names, addresses, phone numbers, intimate details of various peoples personal life, *written in confidence*, in private emails, and etcetera – are not of the devastating stuff which, upon exposure, would have the entire ‘global peace-on-earth in our life-times’ enterprise energetically running, yapping and yelping, to some place somewhere in the neighbourhood of the Van Allen Belt. Viz.:

#10xxx
From: [No. 6 (Sock Puppet ‘A’)]
Date: Sat Dec 24, 2011
Subject: setting the record straight

• [No. 6 (Sock Puppet ‘A’)]: [...]. If I were to disclose any info, I would do it openly and own it – and if I ever come around to doing that, AFT enterprise and its proponents would run off the planet with their tails between their legs. [...].

So, in regards to your follow-up question: there was no USB drive/ memory stick containing ‘a range of material’ of such a devastating nature that [quote] ‘AFT enterprise and its proponents would run off the planet with their tails between their legs’ [endquote] that I either a) ‘accidentally lost’ or ‘left behind’ or b) was ‘careless’ with, such that those contents could have been copied, stolen, or otherwise compromised during or after my visit to India in 2010.

Besides which, all of this unseemly focus upon the contents of electronic media is a herring so ruby-red in its nature that its sheer effulgence is distracting all attention away from the real source material ... namely: paper documents (and many of them). Viz.:

#10xxx
From: [No. 6 (Sock Puppet ‘A’)]
Date: Tue Jan 24, 2012 2:40 pm
Subject: Re: Mr Moderator tear

• [No. 6 (Sock Puppet ‘A’)]: [...]. The fact that I have so much information and knowledge about how he operates and functions and many documents ( paper documents) that prove beyond any doubt about [...].

And you cannot say I did not warn you because, when I said this whole memory stick narrative was penned by Someone Urgently Rewriting Both Her Ideas, it was not only a matter of being droll but a clear indication that any attempt to obtain a truthful account from a ‘star witness’ who changes stories mid-stream is ultimately futile.

(So as to forestall the obvious: no, I did not accidentally leave behind a suitcase full of paper documents of some-such similarly devastating nature, either).

*

What I can say with certainty – the certainty which comes from personal knowledge – is factual, amongst all the lies and deceit, is that she has and/or had in her possession my JasJam ‘i-mate’ PocketPC-cum-mobile phone (costing around Rs60-65,000.00) which I loaned to her, as her cell-phone had stopped working, on the clear understanding she returned it, with all emails, photographic images, and etcetera, stored thereon intact, when she flew as planned to Australia back in December 2010.

Speaking of which, and just in case you have bought into all that made-up stuff about a ‘golden shawl’ and a ‘public ceremony’ and all the rest, this is an apt moment to say that as there were only two other people present when that photograph was taken – namely Justine’s wife and her brother – the occasion is more properly described as a ‘family affair’.

Furthermore, as both his wife and his brother-in-law are devout Christians (his brother-in-law is, in fact, a Catholic Priest), and with little to no idea at all as to what an actual freedom from the human condition is to boot, any words of them bestowing ‘high stature and recognition’ upon ‘the sage that the humanity had been waiting for’ are nothing but the product of the passionate imagination of a serial fantasist.

Regards, Richard.

May 25 2013

Re: Is Actualism Safe?

RESPONDENT: G’Day Richard, I am writing this email to give you an opportunity to help clear the way for myself and others to get over or bypass fears related to becoming free from the human condition.

RICHARD: G’day no. 25, Ha ... in effect, you mean give me yet another opportunity (to help clear the way for yourself and others to get over or bypass fears related to becoming free from the human condition) as I have already done so, previously, with the most recent example – and most the relevant (vis-a-vis the changed circumstances) – being on this very forum on the 21st of February last year in Message No. 11299. 

Here is how it starts:

#11299
From: richard.actualfreedom
Date: Tue Feb 21, 2012 2:27 am
Subject: Re: [...] about two types of Actual Freedom
• [Claudiu]: [...] Your message is frightening enough as it is, to an identity, as the message spells the total extinction of said identity.
• [Richard]: G’day Claudiu, When I read through your recent response to my latest post your above sentence stood out as such an oddity I am sending off this brief note so it will get to you soonest.
I draw your attention to the following (from the original Announcement Page which sat there, in plain view for two whole years, as being the latest words available) and, as you read through it this time around, bear in mind all the way through that word ‘frightening’ you have sent to me, above, because I am going to be asking a ‘reading and comprehension’ query at the end of it. [...]. (Message 11299, Richard, List D, Claudiu, 21 February 2012).

I recommend reading it, in the manner advised, before continuing to read any more of this email.

RESPONDENT: By titling the subject of this email ‘Is Actualism Safe?’ – I intend to bring up certain barriers that have contributed to my feelings of being ‘stuck’ over the years.

RICHARD: I can clearly recall discussing some issue with you one fine afternoon here in Australia where – after having explained the most relevant aspect I mentioned having already written about that very topic on this forum – I registered my astonishment at your admission of having not read all my posts ... even though you were actively engaging in an (aversive) online discussion with me at that time.

RESPONDENT: Due to my last visit with you and Vineeto, many confusions have been cleared up ...

RICHARD: The way in which those ‘many confusions’ were cleared up was, essentially, by verbal reiteration of what is already freely available on The Actual Freedom Trust website.

RESPONDENT: ... and it is obvious that both of you are living a wondrous freedom, yet for me, there remains a feeling of being ‘stuck.’ I want to lay out some of those reason for feeling stuck here and invite you to speak to each item.

1) In your Journal (Appendix Two), you related that you were ‘…accompanied by a sense of dread the likes of which I had never experienced even in a war-zone – made all the more acute because I had not experience fear for four years I was living in a state of Divine Compassion and Love Agape which protected me from malice and the underlying fear). This dread contained the existential angst of discovering that ‘I’ was nothing but a contingent ‘being’ and that ‘I’ would cease to ‘be’.’

RICHARD: Unless you are planning on becoming fully awakened/ enlightened for a number of years prior to discovering that something quite magical lies beyond that summum bonum of the human psyche – previously considered only available post-mortem (e.g., parinirvana and/or mahasamadhi and/or etcetera) – and thus becoming actually free via a tortuous and traumatic route, your feeling of being ‘stuck’ has nowt to do with what the identity parasitically inhabiting this flesh and blood body all those years ago went through.

RESPONDENT: You also related a similar experience of acute dread just prior to becoming free in Appendix Three.

As I read your account, your experiences of acute dread (worse than what you encountered in a war-zone) seems to be related somehow to your enlightened state at the time, but I really don’t know. Would you please explain the content and any known causes of such experiences?

RICHARD: As I have already explained both the content and all the known causes many times over on my portion of The Actual Freedom Trust website – other than, that is, in that very Appendix you refer to – I do wonder just what it is you want of me here ... yet even more reiteration?

RESPONDENT: I find it particularly interesting that with more recent experiences of becoming free, for example Peter, Vineeto, and others you’ve related – there was no wall of fear or dread. The process was ‘matter of fact,’ ‘simple,’ ‘easy.’

RICHARD: That is because they all became (newly) free via the well-publicised epoch-changing opening in human consciousness designated as the ‘direct route’ on the ‘A Long-Awaited Public Announcement’ web page on The Actual Freedom Trust website.

Here are the very first words on that web page:

• ‘The directors of The Actual Freedom Trust take great pleasure in making public knowledge of a direct route at the end of the wide and wondrous path (now both gentrified and rendered secure) to an actual freedom from the human condition – a down-to-earth manumission [from Latin manumittere, lit. ‘send out from one’s hand’, and meaning release from slavery; release from bondage or servitude; set free] hitherto only available dangerously via spiritual enlightenment/ mystical awakenment ...’. (Long Awaited Announcement).

RESPONDENT: How can current actualists bypass such acute experiences of dread on the ‘path’ to freedom?

RICHARD: By tapping into pure intent – nowadays also personified in its feminine aspect (its masculine aspect became personified 30+ months after 1992) – hitherto only accessible via a PCE.

RESPONDENT: Are they [such acute experiences] merely an idiosyncrasy of different personalities, or are they tied to an approach or attitude?

RICHARD: Neither ... they came about because (a) nobody had gone beyond spiritual enlightenment/ mystical awakenment before ... and (b) the direct route (opened by Peter and Richard on the 29th of December, 2009) was yet to be forged back then.

RESPONDENT: Is there a strategy that can be utilized to bypass or minimize such experiences?

RICHARD: Yep ... tapping into pure intent should do the trick nicely.

For instance:

#10876
From: richard.actualfreedom
Date: Sat Feb 4, 2012 12:16 am
Subject: Re: [...] about two types of Actual Freedom
• [Respondent No. 17] [...] Is the pce necessary? ps: Is the pce necessary for pure intent to come out of this vast stillness?
• [Richard]: G’day No. 17, Prior to 11.25 AM (AEDST) on Saturday, the 14th of November, 2009, a pure consciousness experience (PCE) was indeed necessary for pure intent – that benevolence and benignity of the vast and utter stillness of the universe itself – and the reason why a PCE was essential is reported/ described/ explained both on The Actual Freedom Trust website and in ‘Richard’s Journal’.
[...] what the feeling-being inhabiting this flesh-and-blood body all those years ago experienced as an ‘over-arching benevolence and benignity’ was experienced by the feeling-being ‘Peter’, on the 29th of December 2009, as [quote] ‘a sweetness that was palpable’ [endquote] and that ‘he’ was [quote] ‘literally being bathed in this sweetness’ [endquote]. [...].
Other people have reported experiencing that over-arching benevolence and benignity as a palpable sweetness as well.
Pamela, for instance, spoke of it in those terms during the ten minutes or so immediately prior to the pivotal event/the definitive moment when she became actually free of the instinctual passions/the feeling-being formed thereof on the 27th of January 2010.
(On another occasion, about three weeks later, she reported experiencing it as being an ‘infinite tenderness’ of such a magnitude as to render her incoherent upon endeavouring to describe it to Vineeto).
Vineeto [...snip...] has written of it, in a private email, as being ‘an overwhelming sweetness, so overwhelmingly sweet that tears were running down my face. At another time I experienced a tenderness so vast that I was speechless for a good time afterwards’.
I mention these reports so as to demonstrate that what the feeling-being inhabiting this flesh-and-blood body all those years ago experienced as an ‘over-arching benevolence and benignity’ may not necessarily be exactly the way others experience it. [...]. (Message 10876, Richard, List D, No. 17, 4 February 2012).

Incidentally, there is a follow-up email to the above post (partly re-presented further below).

RESPONDENT: 2) This link was shared recently regarding Vineeto’s experience in her early days of practicing actualism. [....au/actualism/vineeto/selected-correspondence/corr-i.htm]. The relevant text is

[Vineeto]: ‘…Two weeks ago, when this bare instinct of survival arose for the first time in its full gamut, I was feeling sick and throwing up, with the stomach like a stone, numbing cramps in the heart area and dizzy in the head. When those physical symptoms reappeared the next day, I wondered where I was going wrong. It seemed an odd and arduous way to end ‘me’ – and I started to look for a way to be happy and healthy while continuing the ending of ‘me’. The question for me was, where did ‘I’ add to the drama, where did ‘I’ interfere or exaggerate? It became obvious that the primitive self, this silly, ancient survival mechanism, is pumping chemicals into every organ, and is actually jeopardizing and endangering my physical well-being – quite the opposite of what it was designed to do in the first place.
A week later I had another strong fear-attack, which I observed fascinated and rather unemotionally. My whole upper torso became numb, blood drained out of my head, heart, chest and arms. There wasn’t enough blood in the brain, so my vision had blind stripes, very curious. It took me a minute to figure out what was happening. I went along with it at first, thrilled and fascinated by the prospect of watching myself, my body, die, but a short while later common sense started to set in. If this was the beginning of a physical heart-attack then this was the wrong way, a ‘dead-end’, as Peter just said. Upon this understanding, the symptoms slowly subsided.
Trying to understand those experiences in hindsight, I would say that on both occasions I had a certain pushy-ness, an almost violent attitude to progress at all costs, no matter what will happen, ‘I’ want freedom now and ‘I’ want to make it happen.
I can see that this urging only increased the fear, making the obstacle bigger than before.’ [endquote].

It seems to me that Vineeto drew the conclusion that to follow these experiences was something of a ‘dead end,’ (although she may have gained valuable experience) yet it was a certain ‘pushy-ness, an almost violent attitude to progress at all costs,’ that caused and amplified these experiences.

Related to this, I remember Peter stating at one time that he allowed himself to get caught up in some sort of ‘hellish’ experience, by which I think he meant visions of imaginary (though felt real) ‘hell-like’ realms – even referring at one point to being ‘ripped asunder.’ [.../actualism/peter/selected-correspondence/corr-psyche.htm].

If I recall correctly, Peter later referred to these experiences, although interesting, as not ultimately fruitful. How can an actualist most easily avoid such experiences?

RICHARD: By tapping into pure intent. Viz.:

#10885
From: richard.actualfreedom
Date: Mon Feb 6, 2012 1:50 am
Subject: Re: Richard writes about two types of Actual Freedom
• [Respondent No. 17]: [...] Does the experiencing of the vastness and stillness of the universe bring on the ‘over-arching benevolence and benignity’ which then brings on the ‘sweetness’? Iow, does ‘experiencing the vastness and stillness’ of the universe come first?
• [Richard]: G’day No. 17, My response (above) was both in the context of your query as to whether a PCE is necessary for pure intent and your follow-up explanation to No. 24 about the last paragraph of ‘Addendum No. 7’ (that to be actually free from the human condition is to be that pure intent).
[...] that ‘over-arching benevolence and benignity’, which the feeling-being inhabiting this flesh-and-blood body all those years ago experienced and named ‘pure intent’, became [immanently] accessible to some select associates during a specific situational setting called ‘The Second Convivium Gathering’, in late 2009/early 2010, and was variously experienced by them as a ‘palpable sweetness’, for instance, and an ‘infinite tenderness’, for example, and has been more generally described as ‘being bathed in intimacy’.
[...].
Thus to answer your first question: the direct (as in, immediate or unmediated) experiencing of the vast stillness of this physical universe’s infinitude – where the word stillness refers to there being no movement of time whatsoever (as in ‘this moment has no duration’) – is the way in which the feeling-being inhabiting this flesh-and-blood body all those years ago became consciously aware of pure intent because, back in those days, there had not yet been someone of sufficient naïveté to enable that immaculate perfection to become purity personified.
Which means that, these days, when that ‘palpable sweetness’ (for instance) is experienced it is that ‘over-arching benevolence and benignity’ being experienced, by virtue of that immaculate perfection having become manifest in the everyday world as a flesh-and-blood body only, as they are both one and the same thing in essence.
Thus to answer your second question: it is the experiencing of that ‘palpable sweetness’ (for instance) which comes first.
P.S.: As there is now both a male and a female fully here in this actual world, the completely new consciousness (a totally original way of being conscious) for all humankind to avail themselves of is nowadays entirely equitable.
And this is truly marvellous.
(See the footnote in Message No. 10573 for some details). (Richard, List D, Rick, #1).
And what being ‘entirely equitable’ means is that the various disturbances – as in teething problems – which that handful of daring pioneers thus found themselves subject to, due to it not being equitable back when they availed themselves of it, is no longer likely to happen. (Message 10885, Richard, List D, No. 17, 6 February 2013).

Editor’s note: This early prognosis was revised in the recent article “The Formation and Persistence of the Social Identity” (22 May 2023). – Viz:

[Richard]: Notwithstanding its phantasmicality, and whether sexualised or not, this aeriform socio-cultural persona can be remarkably persistent – as the shadowy remnants of a lingering conscience-cum-guardian (as portrayed by Peter, who first drew attention to its indistinct wraithlike presence, in January 2010, and as confirmed by Vineeto shortly after) – when newly free from the human condition (and even with a basic actual freedom as the weeks, months, and years roll by) due to being an inculcated entity and therefore relatively unaffected (other than abruptly rendered a ‘toothless-tiger’ as it were) by the extinction of the instinctual passions/ the feeling-being formed thereof at the pivotal moment/ definitive event whereby becoming newly free from the human condition transpires.

As this incorporeal social identity, being a socio-culturally-instilled and parentally-inculcated entity, and not instinctually-based, is not rendered completely null and void consequential to the extinction of the instinctual passions/ the feeling-being formed thereof, a period of accommodation and adjustment and acclimatisation, all throughout the normal day-to-day life, with diligent attention paid to any and all attempts on the part of those shadowy remnants to coalesce and reassert control – and dictate how an actually free person *should* think, operate and behave – ensures the habituated patterns of a life-time eventually cease. 

(...)

Further to Vineeto’s observation about the possible necessity of those shadowy remnants coalescing and reasserting control – so as to ensure a non-disruptive transition from feeling being to being fully actually free – it certainly does function as if it were an inbuilt fail-safe aspect of the process. [end editor’s note].

As that is dated Feb 6, 2012 (and the earlier post Feb 4, 2012) then this quite specific explication has been public knowledge for well over a year now.

RESPONDENT: Also, can you confirm that it is really non-productive to attempt to wear out such dreadful states of mind to the point of causing physical symptoms of illness?

RICHARD: As it is not possible to become actually free of the human condition via the elimination of the affective feelings (as explained in my second footnote to Message No. 12054 for instance) – be it either one-by-one or en masse – any practice of that nature is ‘me’ deflecting attention away from ‘my’ presence.

RESPONDENT: Would you also confirm that you do not see that it is valuable to ‘wear out’ dreadful states of mind – period – unless one is actually already feeling good, and that if one should tip over to feeling badly, then it is best to wait to continue exploration until one is once again feeling good?

RICHARD: As the actualism method is all about tracing back to what it was that occasioned feeling good to ‘tip over’ to feeling bad – and thereby get back to feeling good – the only situation in which it is ‘best to wait’ would be when all avenues to getting back to feeling good have been exhausted to no avail.

Even then it is a matter of ‘sitting it out’, so to speak, as ‘wearing it out’ is, as already mentioned, a case of ‘me’ deflecting attention away from ‘my’ presence.

RESPONDENT: 3) From [...com.au/sundry/frequentquestions/FAQ67a.htm] – the relevant portion being…

It seems to me that you currently see things differently than in the above quoted material.

RICHARD: As the ‘above quoted material’ was written prior to the direct route being opened by Peter and Richard on Dec 29, 2009, via a personified pure intent becoming immanently accessible (i.e., not via a PCE), it is no longer necessary to even contemplate any such invocation of a rapid (and sudden) way with all its attendant ‘too much, too fast, too soon’ dangers.

RESPONDENT: Would you speak to why you stated in this quote that ‘one could go mad with the super-abundance o’ as being a very smooth, easy, instantaneous transition?

RICHARD: There does appear to be some missing text in your query (after the word ‘super-abundance’ and before the words ‘as being’).

However, I get the drift of what you are asking – comparing the possibility of going mad ‘with the super-abundance of pleasure that pours forth’ (from the vast stillness which is the ‘everywhere all at once’ source of everything apparent) to that which Peter eloquently describes, on the original Announcement Page which sat there in plain view for two whole years as being the latest words available, as ‘a seamless transition between two worlds’ – inasmuch my ‘too much, too fast, too soon’ words might seem redundant to someone not having read all of my emails posted since that two-year interregnum.

Perhaps if I were to put it thisaway: becoming (newly) free of the instinctual passions/the feeling-being formed thereof – as distinct from being (fully) free of identity in toto/the entire affective faculty – is the minimalist version of an actual freedom.

As such it provides for an appropriate period of accommodation and adjustment and acclimatisation before segueing into the full actual freedom.

RESPONDENT: Have you changed your mind that such a rapid transition would ‘blow the fuses,’ so to speak, and if so, why?

RICHARD: No, not at all; each of that handful of daring pioneers reports a period of accommodation and adjustment and acclimatisation and Vineeto, for instance, has used terms such as ‘too much’ or ‘too over-whelming’ inasmuch from time-to-time she could bear no more of what she has often referred to as ‘an ambrosial immanence’ filling her up.

For example (from Message No. 10929):

• [Richard]: ‘For about three weeks prior to this [an existential event of some considerable significance on the 28th of August 2011] she had been experiencing a near-constant pressure-pain in the nape of the neck, so she knew that something was imminent, as well as experiencing what she referred to as ‘an ambrosial immanence’ filling her up, inasmuch from time-to-time she could bear no more of it (such as to cause her to refrain from interacting intensively for two-three days until it dissipated) due to it being ‘too much’ or ‘too over-whelming’ for her ...’. (Richard, List D, Claudiu, 9 February 2012).

#11394
From: richard.actualfreedom
Date: Thu Feb 23, 2012 4:05 am
Subject: Re: [...] about two types of Actual Freedom
• [Richard]: [...]. (So as to convey some idea of what it entailed I have, on occasion, likened the intensity of that involuntary and incessant synaptic reconfiguration to what it would be like, after having physically gashed an arm or leg deeply, to then spend the next 30+ months dragging the sharp point of a sewing-needle back-and-forth through that gash 24/7, with-out any let-up whatsoever, and with all of modern medicine’s arsenal of drugs only exacerbating/ magnifying the intensity). [...]. (Richard, List D, Claudiu, 23 February 2012).

http://groups.yahoo.com/group/actualfreedom/message/10929 (Richard, List D, Claudiu, 9 February 2012).
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/actualfreedom/message/10951 (Richard, List D, Rick, 11 February 2012).
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/actualfreedom/message/11150 (Richard, List D, No. 37a, 17 February 2012).
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/actualfreedom/message/11273 (Richard, List D, Claudiu, 21 February 2012).
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/actualfreedom/message/11394 (Richard, List D, Claudiu, 23 February 2012).

#7588
From: richard.actualfreedom
Date: Mon Nov 16, 2009 1:05 pm
Subject: Re: Peculiar Information # 5
• [Richard to No.7]: [...].
Although that information was solely in the context of my reports being circumscribed, by the fact that the persons concerned were both readily identifiable and still alive, it did not elude me that the death of the very first practicing actualist[1] was a salutary reminder that everybody is but a missed heat-beat or two away from death each and every day of their life. [...].
Footnote: [1]the very first practicing actualist:
She was not only the very first practicing actualist but the term ‘virtual freedom’ was coined especially for her out-from-control different way of being (from November 1995 to December 1996), during which period she wrote those (italicised) sections of hers which appear in ‘Richard’s Journal’, as a way of referring to the truly remarkable condition – short of an actual freedom itself – by which she verified and affirmed my (as-then-unnamed) virtual freedom of 1981 as being not only replicable but, of course, equally possible for a female as well as a male.
(In case this looks suspiciously like a trivia-collection moment there was no way in which I was going to go public until or unless there was something demonstrably possible whilst still within the human condition to have on offer).
She also came up with the word wondrous, in the alliterative term ‘wide and wondrous path’ (as contrasted to that well-known term ‘the straight and narrow’) when I got stuck, after substituting the word wide for the word narrow, whilst trying out several different replacements for the word straight (the opposite of which is, of course, the word crooked).
The name was entirely apt as wonder (as in wide-eyed wonder) is an essential element in naïveté. [...]. (Message 7588, Richard, List D, No. 7, 16 November 2009.).

• [Co-Respondent]: ‘Richard, I have read this definition of naiveté earlier on AF site, but could never really understand it. You define it as ‘the closest approximation to innocence one can have whilst being a ‘self’’. But what is this ‘innocence’ one can have whilst being a ‘self’.
• [Richard]: ‘It is the nearest a ‘self’ can have to innocence ... innocence is when the ‘self’ is no longer in existence.
• [Co-Respondent]: ‘Can you please describe it the way you describe your AF experience.
• [Richard]: ‘In a nutshell it is where one is walking through the world in a state of wide-eyed wonder ... simply marvelling at it all. Naiveté is that intimate aspect of oneself that one usually keeps hidden away for fear of seeming foolish ... it is like being a child again, but with adult sensibilities, which means that one can separate out the distinction between being naïve and being gullible.
Some synonyms of naiveté are: guileless, artless, simple, ingenuous, innocuous, unsophisticated, artless, frank, open.
What ensues when one walks through the world in a state of wide-eyed wonder and amazement – simply marvelling at the magnificence that this physical universe actually is – is a blitheness (being carefree, happy, merry, amiable and so on) and a gaiety (jollity, joviality, cheeriness, delight, fun, and so on) as the inevitable result ... cynicism can no longer get a look-in.
One can easily enter into the magical fairy-tale-like paradise that this verdant and azure earth actually is’. (Richard, Actual Freedom List, No. 4a, 4 Apr 2002).

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